The Hairy Song

I remember clearly when I was a young lad
Something led me to believe I was a bit different
Kid walked up to me with a casual greeting
Tripped up on my hair, recommended his barber

They call me Mister Hairy Man
It’s obvious why I can understand
They call me Mister Hairy Man
The walking carpet man

They often use my hairy legs to soak up oil spills
Exxon Valdez, hey that one was me
I’m sometimes called for fake documentaries
Gorillas in the Mist – I was the whole cast

But I wouldn’t have it any other way
It’s nice and warm don’t care what people say
Imposing visage of a big teddy bear
Yeah, I’ve got lots of hair

Now it doesn’t matter, making lots of money
I’m able to support three carpet factories
Produce only the best woolen Berber
Stain and heat resistant – there’s nothing softer

words & music:
D. Allen-Williams 1997